Homepage / Flash Fiction / Deblog 5: Change
How Love Works Probably Legally Insane Don’t Call Me Late When Business Communication Goes Pffft! Or, How I’ve Been Insane for Two Months and Counting Don’t Eat That! or, Life as a Pet Parent In Dreams It’s the End of … Almost Like the Real Thing Plus a Lesson in Sacred Spaces What Goes Down Must Come Up Dreams Do Come True Gains and Losses Need to Invest? I’ve Got the Perfect Thing … Very Super-suspicious, Pt. 2 – One Day’s Journey Very Super-suspicious, Pt. 1 – A Dr. Seuss Epiphany Life Is Hard Sometimes #TBT: These Days, I am Only Part Throw-Back Has Anyone Told You Lately … Life’s New Groove I Don’t Share  Purging Past and Current Pains Demolishing ‘Beatriz at Dinner’ The Hump is Hell Book Review: The Dragon with a Chocolate Heart Disaster Averted or How My Blog Imploded For a Minute Negative much? Tides of Winter: Book Three (The Felix Chronicles) A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Amazon … Research about the US Presidential Election: Invite and Share! It’s a Birthday and More, 2017 And the Winner Is … On the Upcoming US Presidential Inauguration Contest time! A (Potentially Lengthy) Missive on a Problem with Today’s Christian Church Pros and Cons of Working from Home Cozy Comforts How You Doin’, 2017? Deblog 31: Change Deblog 30: My Way Deblog 29: Hip City Life Revisited Deblog 28: A Moment of Clarity Deblog 27: The Future Deblog 26: Grammar the Day After Deblog 25: Christmas Get-Down Deblog 24: Christmas Hippo! Deblog 23: The Worst Job in the World Deblog 22: Dark Spaces Deblog 21: Real-Life Parenting at Christmas Deblog 20: It Came In the Wind Deblog 19: Do Me a Solid Deblog 18: Another Un-Birthday Deblog 17: Differences Deblog 16: On Giving Deblog 15: A Good Time Deblog 14: Happy Feelin’s. No, Really. Deblog 13: About Relationships, or Why No One is a Plow Horse Deblog 12: About Practical Girls, or Why I Cried While Watching ‘Through the Looking Glass’ Deblog 11: About Girlie Girl Princesses, or Why They Can Never Be Queens Deblog 10: Leadership Deblog 9: What Is Love, Anyway? Deblog 8: Happy Deblog 7: Thing’s Internet Deblog 6: Heaven Deblog 5: Change Deblog 4: Nick Hood’s Story Deblog 3: Jeeves Deblog 2: Exile Island Deblog 1: December is Full of Blogidays Plovember 30: And There You Have It Plovember 29: Citizens United Plovember 28: Another Brilliant Idea Plovember 27: Revolt Plovember 26: Outrageous Plovember 25: Figment Plovember 24: All Over Again Plovember 23: Quantum Argument Plovember 22: Every Kind of People Plovember 21: I Look Fear in the Face and Say … Plovember 20: What ‘Unfriend’ Means Plovember 19: Irregular Woman Plovember 18: My Reality Plovember 17: When the Monsters Inside Your Head are Real Plovember 16: Wild Heartbreak Plovember 15: I Nearly Quit Plovember 14: Nerd Life Plovember 13: It Was A Day Unlike Any … Wait A Minute. Plovember 12: It’s A Matter of Faith Plovember 11: Simply Wild Plovember Extra, Day Two! The Alien Hour, Part Two! Plovember 10: Look at California Nano Ploblano, the Extra Edition: The Alien Hour, Part One Plovember 9: Four-Wheelin Fun Plovember 8: Flight Plovember 7: Through the Looking Glass Plovember 6: Hip City Life. Or Something. Plovember 5: We Interrupt This Story to Bring You Standing Rock Plovember 4: The Horror Continues Plovember 3: Not What I Wanted Plovember 2: Norse Asian Fusion? Plovember 1: Fiesta! Plovember Prep and Preview

Flash Fiction

Deblog 5: Change

There are times in the life of the average person when not-so-average things happen.

It’s easy to fall into a poor state of mind — The world is against me! Look at all that has happened! I lost my job, I can’t pay all my bills on time (or at all), I can’t shop like I want, I have to stretch the groceries. Why me? Where is God in all this?

And on it goes, the whining. I’m as guilty as the next. When my full-time contract ended in 2013, I said a few of those things. Full disclosure: I never thought the world was against me or asked where God was, since I knew God was there with me. After all, God knew why I had to leave that gig. It was the best thing that could have happened to me, even though I still haven’t recovered financially.

I was free from the suit set (no offense if you’re pushing the corporate rhetoric around for your bread and butter) and had the ability to care for my special needs son in ways I had not been able to do for the previous 17 years of his life.

For 17 years of his life, it was like I ran the hamster wheel and because of it, had left him behind.

Once my job situation changed, I was a full-time parent for the first time ever. Once he got situated, I was able to concentrate on caring for Christopher. I could jump up and take him to doctor’s visits. After I started working online, I was able to carry my laptop to the hospital whenever he was there.

Things changed again after Christopher Left to cross the Rainbow Bridge. I was completely alone (save for my four-legged monsters) for the first time in about 25 years. I could begin to care for myself and my home, to decide what I wanted to do and when.

Needless to say, change is difficult. I do wonder what things would be like if I was still making as much as I did when I worked outside the house full-time. What it would be like not to worry about health insurance, if the next phone call will be a bill collector, how I will pay for auto repairs, or if I’ll have enough for the mortgage. But that’s not my lot yet. Change has helped me write out all the things I need to take care of each month, something I hadn’t done before.

Ever.

In life.

Yeah, you read that right — never created a budget. Don’t judge.

Change has meant I know where the shortfall is and how much I need to make in the future to surpass it.

Change has meant I have had to let go of a lot of people, places, and things.

Change has been painful and some days continues to be so. Especially when I encounter someone who expects me to still be who I was before all this.

But change has been good. Change has enabled me to lean into my faith.

Change has encouraged me to be me, whatever that looks or sounds like, every day.

Change has brought me in contact with new people.

Change has allowed me to learn more about people who were known to me before.

Change means new things are coming because old things have moved down the Path (big up’s to The Dark Tower — I love the notion of the Path …).

And that’s good.

 

 

blogidays2016

dblog

 

Comments are closed.

%d bloggers like this: