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Flash Fiction

Deblog 6: Heaven

To be clear, I don’t believe in reincarnation. However, I would suspect heaven must be like this:

We can experience what it’s like to do superhuman things, like fly, teleport, and so on.

No, really.

I mean, what would paradise be without flying?

Okay, so there’s more to heaven than that. It’s a place of happiness, joy, and comedy. After all, streets of gold? You know people like me, who can’t skate, will be slipping and sliding everywhere. That’s hysterical!

More importantly, we’ll get to catch up with loved ones who have already crossed that Rainbow Bridge to their salvation.

I don’t believe in reincarnation but as a Christ-follower, I do believe in salvation through belief.

I dreamed of Jesus once.

I was in a boat — it was a lot like those carved canoes the movies always show Indigenous people using. It was quite some time ago and if I remember correctly, I was floating on a stream that was running through my old ‘hood in South Jersey (Cape May County is basically a sandy knoll, so weirder things could occur). I floated past my Nana’s house and she was sitting on the front stoop, shucking peas. She smiled at me and I steered the boat to the ‘shore’ in front of her. As I moved closer to the edge so I could climb out, Jesus walked over and extended His hand to me. I took it and He helped me. I don’t think any words were exchanged, but I had this dream quite a few years ago so don’t hold me to that. Anyway, we walked together to my Nana, who just kept smiling.

When I get to heaven, my Nana will be one of the first people I visit. Even though she and her husband adopted my dad, she was my grandmother. She loved me and I loved her. Full disclosure — of all my older relatives who’ve Gone On, I miss her the most, still.

I also want to visit the apostle Paul. I suspect he’ll be in the library. Which of course is a place I will probably spend quite a bit of time. I’m sure the library in heaven still has a card catalog. And that machine that embosses the reader’s number onto the card from the back of each book. It will smell of old paper and the sounds of fluttering pages and echoing whispers will float about.

I expect to see my Mom-Mom and Pop-Pop, my mom’s parents, as well. Christopher will be there, and my son’s father, my first husband probably will be as well.

The thing about heaven is that none of us holds the keys.

Saint Peter doesn’t either, by the way. But I digress.

My son’s father had accepted salvation, despite how he treated me. It is for that reason I am expecting to see others who crossed the Rainbow Bridge and who might not have lived the way the Pharisees of modern day would expect from ‘religious people’. The problem there is that salvation and religion are extremely different matters. But again, I digress.

I look forward to seeing some folks and others, not so much. That’s real life. Since the idea is that I will get to ‘live’ for eternity once I cross the Rainbow Bridge into heaven, it will be really real life forever, right? If you know me, then you know I don’t mince words. There will be people in heaven I don’t want to see. I mean, if I happen to slide by them whilst trying to keep my balance on those streets of gold, chances are I won’t say ‘hey’. I mean, if they were still alive, I wouldn’t, so why front?

One place I’d spend another good bit of time would be the animal park. In heaven, it stands to reason that all animals would get along. I’ll get my chance to pet a lion, feed a mastodon, maybe sit between the spikes on a stegosaurus’s tail. I’d play catch with Zerk and Prince again and maybe even see Brutus; I wonder if he’d remember me since our acquaintance was short. And Pi will be there, which will make for a most proper time. I’m sure the cats I’ve known will be there as well, but as someone who is more partial to dogs, you know.

Yet, the best part of the whole thing will be to visit God’s pad. I mean, what digs, right? Can you imagine how comfy the couch is? And you know God probably has every television channel ever created and then some. The size of the remote, after all!

Don’t get me wrong — I’m not writing this to suggest I’m rushing to get to heaven. When my ticket gets punched, it will be when it is.

I heard the song below and well, there you have it.

God has the biggest sense of humor.


After all, God created people.

Including me.

You gotta have a huge sense of humor to do something like that.






  1. Lyn December 6, 2016 2:59 pm

    Actually, I think we will speak to the people we don’t want to speak to now. It wouldn’t be heaven otherwise. We’ll be continually praising God, and we can’t do that if we’re trying to duck behind a temple pillar or curtain to avoid someone 😀

    The Bible tells us that when we get to heaven that “He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.” I love the idea of being able to flit around from planet to planet. We can even walk through walls, I mean, Jesus did, didn’t He? We’ll have a resurrection body just like Jesus’s resurrection body.

    I’m determined to know the Bible better before I get to heaven too. I’d hate to have Ezra come up to me and ask, “So, what did you think about my book?” It would be very embarrassing to have to say, “Umm… er… you wrote a book?” 😀 😀

    • AR Neal December 6, 2016 4:15 pm

      Hahaha! Right?? Love that! Yes, it’s true — we will see the folks we don’t want to speak to now. I suspect I’ll still be at least a bit contrary and as such won’t hide but won’t stop for a chat either 😉

      • Lyn December 6, 2016 6:26 pm

        LOL I wonder if they have coffee shops in Heaven 😀

        • AR Neal December 8, 2016 5:16 pm

          I can’t imagine we won’t have coffee shops, cake shops, and all sorts of succulent treats. It’s heaven after all!

          • Lyn December 8, 2016 8:05 pm


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