Deblog 13: About Relationships, or Why No One is a Plow Horse

 

Hopefully, you’ve stuck in through the posts about two types of girls and the women they become.

There’s one more piece and before you get up in arms about the title, it’s an extension of a metaphor. See for yourself; I’ll wait.

Get it now?

In the course of a conversation about the girlie-girl/princess epiphany,  a certain Mr. F. Clearing (a king I know personally) told me about the video above and after watching it, I decided to add one more tidbit to make my duo of posts a trio.

This short animation sums up the misconception that the princess woman has — that it is her job to ‘tame’ her partner and write his story. If the world tells her that she deserves a king and how he would act if he was, in fact, her king, she goes through hell and high water to make him that way. In such a real-life scenario, it matters not that this partner is a good man, a provider, and willing to do what it takes to make the relationship work. For the princess woman, what matters is that he does life her way. And if he doesn’t, she sulks and is upset that the world does not revolve around her. Additionally, while some princess women are capable of taking care of themselves, they seem to get into a frame of mind in which they expect their partners to do it.

Chances are, the man entered the scene with the impression that he was joining with a partner but instead landed slavemaster. Instead of the love and freedom that comes from connecting to a person with who encourages him to achieve good things and who he encourages to achieve good things, he lands someone full of resentment, jealousy, and disrespect.

The practical woman is attracted to someone who is at least as independent as she. He is someone perfectly capable of caring for himself. The difference with her is that she shows appreciation for what this partner does for her instead of expecting it. She is happy to do things for him as well — it brings her joy to bring him joy. They encourage one another’s dreams. Hence, there is a partnership.

There is yet one other problem in the universe that influences the practical woman as well — the world. Magazines, talk shows, and websites cater to princess woman ideology. They suggest that a woman can have it all if she does this, that, or the other. Next time you’re in the grocery checkout line, look at one of those magazines on the rack next to the Slim Jims and candy bars. Instructions for ‘getting the guy’ and such drivel go into horrifying detail about what boils down to manipulation. An unaware practical woman could fall into such a trap as well. It’s almost like there is a conspiracy to create damaged relationships …

The message is this: even queens can get bad advice or are susceptible to poor judgment that leads them to mistreat their partners.

You might wonder then if I am suggesting there is no hope.

Absolutely not.

What I am suggesting is two-fold:

  • Princess women need to check themselves. Buck up, step up, and stop it. To get the king, a princess woman needs to trade in her tiara for a crown. Take care of herself, learn how to consider the thoughts of others, leave off the resentment and offer support. Understand that relationships require both partners to carry the load together — neither partner is a plow horse.
  • Practical women must check themselves as well. To keep a king, a practical woman must remember to remain grateful and continue holding up her part of the load, whatever that might be — neither partner is a plow horse.

In the end, it boils down to the same thing.

You’re welcome.

 

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